Turn Comparison Into Compassion

Do you compare yourself to others? I wish I could say that I don’t do that anymore. Those days are long gone, left way back in middle school. But, I am still a girl. Still a perfectionist. And, I still have moments when I doubt who I am and what I am doing.

That was hard for me to write; hard for me to admit to myself.

I am a State Titleholder for a prestigious organization. I am a Mother that four human beings look up to. I am a Wife that is loved by her Prince Charming. How could I not be completely and utterly content and confident in me?!

Unfortunately, it just happens. In my opinion, I believe it’s the enemy. I believe there is an enemy in the world that tries to keep us off track. He tries to make us forget who we are. Whose we are. The enemy wants me to doubt myself because it takes away my zeal. The zeal to accomplish God’s purpose goes out the window. So much goodness is lost. Lost on what? Lost on my twisted image of another person.

It makes me mad. Mad at myself for being so foolish.

Self-doubt can look different on different people. One of my sweet, joyful girls deals with fear. During this season of life, she fears that her schoolwork will be too hard and it makes her shut down. She spirals into self-doubt, cries uncontrollably, and has a hard time stopping.

Self-doubt is the root of fear. Self-doubt is the root of comparison. 

God is always faithful even when I am not, and He spoke through me as I taught my daughter how to combat this irrationality.

Out of my mouth came these words, “You have to tell yourself how to act. Say it out loud. Take verbal control over those bad thoughts and let the confidence take over.”

(Many times, the words “I” have spoken to my children have actually ministered to my own spirit. That’s one of the truest ways I can prove the Holy Spirit exists. My words are not my own. Words come out that I didn’t even think about. They were just said and they were powerful. Thank you, Holy Spirit!)

In the pageant world, comparison and self-doubt is easy to fall into. Recently, I was comparing myself to previous title holders. The title holders that I look up to. The title holders who have impacted my life. Instead of loving them and honoring them for being 100% authentically themselves, I was intimidated and was unable to share in their joys. Foolish, right?! (and embarrassing to admit!)

Our wonderful Mrs. International 2019 is accomplishing so many outstanding things. She has traveled to more countries than I can remember and continues to selflessly impact many lives every day. It was hard for me not to envy and be intimidated by the impressive work she continues to do. She is AMAZING!

Along with that comparison came separation. I could not fully be on her team because I was blinded by comparison.

To fully love another human being, we have to love ourselves. Not in vanity, but by loving who God created.

My self-doubt finally lost its authority over me when I changed comparison into compassion.

Photo by @thiszun (follow me on IG, FB) on Pexels.com

Compassion filled my heart. This beautiful woman has had to put a halt to the opportunity of a lifetime. The Coronavirus crisis had rearranged the plans she created years ago. The goals she created for Mrs. International 2019 to accomplish. I can only imagine the pain and disappointment she has felt. And guess what, she has handled it with grace. Always positive, hopeful, giving, and graceful.

Don’t let self-doubt lead you into comparison and separation. There is so much beauty to see in others. Don’t miss out.

Shine your light for all the world to see and celebrate the light of those around you.

#Pageantry #kindness #comparison #resentment #beauty #pageant #compassion #beautypageant